My husband is a scientist by profession, I love him for his steady-being nature, and I love the warm feeling while lean against his broad shoulder.
Three years in the courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, I am getting tired of it, the reasons of me loving him before has now transform into the cause of all the restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive and exquisite when it comes to relationship and feelings, I yearn for romantic moments, as though a little boy yearning for candy.
And my husband, is just a contrast of me, his lack of sensitivity, and of all, inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love.
One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I want a divorce.
"Why?" he asked, shocking.
"I am tired, there aren't reasons for everything in the world" I answered.
He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thoughts the whole night with cigarette lighted all the times.
My feeling of disappointment is getting intense, a man who can't even express his detainment, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked :" What can I do to change your mind?"
Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him. Look deep into his eyes and I slowly answered : "Here is a question, if you can find the answer in my heart, I will change my mind, Let say, I love a flower at a mountain cliff, and we both sure that the making you to pick the flower will cause death, will you do it for me?"
He said :" I will give you your answer tomorrow...."
My heart just sink by listening to his respond. The next morning, he was not around, and I saw a piece of paper with his scratching writing, underneath a glass of warm milk, It goes....
Dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but please allowed me to further explain the reasons " this first lines has already break my heart. I continue reading.
"You can only type with computer and always messed up the programs in the PC, and cries in front of screen, I have to saved my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.
You always left the house key behind, I have to save my legs to rush home for opening the door for you.
You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to leads you the way.
You always has the cramp whenever your "good friend" approach every month, I have to save my palm so that I can calm the cramp at your tummy.
You like to stays indoor, and I worries that you will be infected by infantile autism.I have to save my mouth to tells you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.
You always stared at the computers, and that do no good to your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow older, I can help to clip your nails,and help to removed those annoying white hairs. I will hold your hand,stroll down the beach, enjoying the sunshine and the beautiful sands...tells you the colour of flowers, just like the glow on your young face...
Thus, my dear, before I am sure there are someone who loves you more than I do... I would not pick the flower, and die.. "
My tears drops on the letters, and blurred the ink of his hand writing..and I resume my reading... "And now, dear... you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied with these answers, please open the door of our house, I am standing there,with your favorite bread and fresh milk... I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, with his hand holding tight on the milk and bread....
Oh I am sure no one ever love me as much, and now I have decided to leave the flower alone...
That's life, or some said, love, when one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fade away, and one tend to ignore the true love lies in between the peace and dullness. Love shows in any form, even a very little and corny form, it has never been a model, it could be the most incurious form.. . flowers, romantic moments is only the buckish formed on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of truelove stands... and that's our life...
I hope everyone enjoy reading it... love, but not words win the arguments...
What's yours is yours even if u let it go What's not yours will never be yours even if u hold on
"Who Cares, Life is full of surprises!" Stubbornly different
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
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Wednesday, 20 October 2010
what is best for you?
A turtle family decided to go on a picnic. Turtles, being naturally slow about things, took seven years to prepare for their outing. Finally the turtle family left home looking for a suitable place for their outing.
During the second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last! For about six months they cleaned up the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed.
After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow-moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell.
He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned.
The family consented and the little turtle left. Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years...six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his
hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich. At that point the
little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, "SEE! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."
Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations.
We lose track of what's the most important thing in our lives. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we don't do anything ourselves.
Result: do not depends on others just do your own work sincerely.
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
During the second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last! For about six months they cleaned up the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed.
After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow-moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell.
He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned.
The family consented and the little turtle left. Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years...six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his
hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich. At that point the
little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, "SEE! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."
Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations.
We lose track of what's the most important thing in our lives. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we don't do anything ourselves.
Result: do not depends on others just do your own work sincerely.
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
what is correct thinking?
The Pretty Lady:
Once upon a time, a big monk and a little monk were travelling together.
They came to the bank of a river and found the bridge was damaged. They had to walk across the river. There was a pretty lady who was stuck at the damaged bridge and couldn't cross the river. The big monk offered to carry the pretty lady across the river on his back. The lady accepted.
The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk."How can big disciple brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?" thought the little monk.
But he kept quiet. The big monk carried the lady cross the river and the small monk followed unhappily.
When they had crossed the river, the big monk let the lady down and they parted ways with her.
All along the way for several miles, the little monk was very unhappy with the act of the big monk. He was making up all kinds of accusations about the
big monk in his head. This got him madder and
madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation.
Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk. "How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a
female, especially when she is very pretty? All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite."
The big monk looked surprised and said, "I had put down the pretty lady at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?"
This very old Chinese zen story reflects the thinking of many people today.
We encounter many unpleasant things in our life, they irritate us and they make us angry. Sometimes, they cause us a lot of hurt, sometimes they cause us to be bitter or jealous. But like the little monk, we are not willing to let them go away. We keep on carrying the baggage of the "pretty lady" with us. We let them keep on coming back to hurt us, make us angry, make us bitter and cause us a lot of agony. Why? Simply because we are not willing to put down or let go of the
baggage of the "pretty lady". We should let go of the pretty lady immediately after crossing the river, immediately after the unpleasant event is over. This will immediately remove all our agonies. There is no need to be further hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over. It is just that simple.
Moral: please write in comments what you have learn from it?
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
Once upon a time, a big monk and a little monk were travelling together.
They came to the bank of a river and found the bridge was damaged. They had to walk across the river. There was a pretty lady who was stuck at the damaged bridge and couldn't cross the river. The big monk offered to carry the pretty lady across the river on his back. The lady accepted.
The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk."How can big disciple brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?" thought the little monk.
But he kept quiet. The big monk carried the lady cross the river and the small monk followed unhappily.
When they had crossed the river, the big monk let the lady down and they parted ways with her.
All along the way for several miles, the little monk was very unhappy with the act of the big monk. He was making up all kinds of accusations about the
big monk in his head. This got him madder and
madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation.
Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk. "How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a
female, especially when she is very pretty? All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite."
The big monk looked surprised and said, "I had put down the pretty lady at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?"
This very old Chinese zen story reflects the thinking of many people today.
We encounter many unpleasant things in our life, they irritate us and they make us angry. Sometimes, they cause us a lot of hurt, sometimes they cause us to be bitter or jealous. But like the little monk, we are not willing to let them go away. We keep on carrying the baggage of the "pretty lady" with us. We let them keep on coming back to hurt us, make us angry, make us bitter and cause us a lot of agony. Why? Simply because we are not willing to put down or let go of the
baggage of the "pretty lady". We should let go of the pretty lady immediately after crossing the river, immediately after the unpleasant event is over. This will immediately remove all our agonies. There is no need to be further hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over. It is just that simple.
Moral: please write in comments what you have learn from it?
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
Tuesday, 19 October 2010
What is wisdom?
A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use
a million frog legs. The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man
where he could get so many frog legs!
The farmer replied,"There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs
---millions of them. They all croak all night long and they are about to
make me crazy!" So the restaurant owner and the farmer made an agreement
that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a
time for the next several weeks.
The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather
sheepish,with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner said, "Well...
where are all the frogs?" The farmer said, "I was
mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were
making a lot of noise!"
Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember, it's
probably just a couple of noisy frogs. Also remember that problems always
seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in
your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost overwhelming like
a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning
comes, and you take a closer look, you'll wonder what all the fuss was
about.
Result: do not speak before knowing reality
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
a million frog legs. The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man
where he could get so many frog legs!
The farmer replied,"There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs
---millions of them. They all croak all night long and they are about to
make me crazy!" So the restaurant owner and the farmer made an agreement
that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a
time for the next several weeks.
The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather
sheepish,with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner said, "Well...
where are all the frogs?" The farmer said, "I was
mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were
making a lot of noise!"
Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember, it's
probably just a couple of noisy frogs. Also remember that problems always
seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in
your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost overwhelming like
a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning
comes, and you take a closer look, you'll wonder what all the fuss was
about.
Result: do not speak before knowing reality
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
Thursday, 14 October 2010
what is importance of parents for children?
Can I borrow $. 25?
A woman came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find her 5-year old son waiting for her at the door.
SON: 'Mummy, may I ask you a question?'
MUM: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the woman.
SON: 'Mummy, how much do you make an hour?'
MUM: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the woman said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
MUM: 'If you must know, I make $. 50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Mummy, may I please borrow $.25?'
The mother was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.'
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door..
The woman sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the woman had calmed down, and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $.25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The woman went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
'Are you asleep, son?' She asked.
'No Mummy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.
'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the woman. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $.25 you asked for.'
The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you Mummy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The woman saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his mother.
'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the mother grumbled.
'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.
'Mummy, I have $.50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'
The mother was crushed. She put his arms around her little son, and she begged for his forgiveness.
It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that R50 worth of your time with someone you love.
morel:- If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
SON: 'Mummy, may I ask you a question?'
MUM: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the woman.
SON: 'Mummy, how much do you make an hour?'
MUM: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the woman said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
MUM: 'If you must know, I make $. 50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Mummy, may I please borrow $.25?'
The mother was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.'
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door..
The woman sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the woman had calmed down, and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $.25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The woman went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
'Are you asleep, son?' She asked.
'No Mummy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.
'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the woman. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $.25 you asked for.'
The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you Mummy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The woman saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his mother.
'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the mother grumbled.
'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.
'Mummy, I have $.50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'
The mother was crushed. She put his arms around her little son, and she begged for his forgiveness.
It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that R50 worth of your time with someone you love.
morel:- If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, 13 October 2010
what is clever thinking?
There once was a very poor man, who woke up hungry with only 1 rupee left in his pocket.
He decides to go to the market and see if his rupee can buy him some left over fruit.
At the market he meets a fancy clothed man behind a table with a beautiful oil lamp on it, and a sign that reads "1 rupee".
The poor man can't believe his eyes, and asks the man what the catch is.
It's true, the lamp only costs 1 rupee, the man says.
And he explains that in the lamp there lives a genie, who fulfills all your desires.
"Then why do you sell it?", the poor man wants to know.
"Well, the genie is always active and rather impatient", it is explained. "And if you don't pay attention to him, he'll start taking things away again".
"Well OK", the poor man says. "Since I don't have much to lose I will buy it from you".
When he arrives back home, he rubs the lamp and the genie appears. "How can I serve you, master?", he asks.
"Prepare me a meal worthy of a king", the poor man commands.
Within a second the genie serves an opulous meal with 87 courses.
The poor man is delighted, but when he wants to start eating, the genie asks again - "And how can I serve you master?"
Keeping in mind that the genie can also take away all the goodies, the poor man commands: "Build me a beautiful castle, suitable for a maharadja!"
Only a few seconds pass by, and the man now finds himself in a beautiful palace. He likes to explore it, but there comes the genie again, asking "How can I serve you, master?"
Every wish is immediately fulfilled, and when ignored, the genie takes away everything.
The poor man is annoyed and goes to the village sage, where he explains his problem.
After a silent conversation, the poor man steps to the genie and says: 'Genie, build me a large pole and stick it in the ground".
The genie immediately builds a pole and sticks it in the ground.
"Now genie, I want you to climb up and down the pole, over and over again".
The genie starts climbing right away.
And now the man has time to eat his meal, explore his palace and do other things.
When he and the sage go to see what the genie is doing, they see that he has fallen asleep next to the pole.
"And so it is with the thinking genie of every man", explains the sage.
"It is restless in its desire to satisfy every desire, and fragments our being.
The pole is a tool called a 'mantra'.
By repeating it over and over again, our restless mind is kept busy until it gets so bored that it falls asleep.
And this way our true self can enjoy the world."
He decides to go to the market and see if his rupee can buy him some left over fruit.
At the market he meets a fancy clothed man behind a table with a beautiful oil lamp on it, and a sign that reads "1 rupee".
The poor man can't believe his eyes, and asks the man what the catch is.
It's true, the lamp only costs 1 rupee, the man says.
And he explains that in the lamp there lives a genie, who fulfills all your desires.
"Then why do you sell it?", the poor man wants to know.
"Well, the genie is always active and rather impatient", it is explained. "And if you don't pay attention to him, he'll start taking things away again".
"Well OK", the poor man says. "Since I don't have much to lose I will buy it from you".
When he arrives back home, he rubs the lamp and the genie appears. "How can I serve you, master?", he asks.
"Prepare me a meal worthy of a king", the poor man commands.
Within a second the genie serves an opulous meal with 87 courses.
The poor man is delighted, but when he wants to start eating, the genie asks again - "And how can I serve you master?"
Keeping in mind that the genie can also take away all the goodies, the poor man commands: "Build me a beautiful castle, suitable for a maharadja!"
Only a few seconds pass by, and the man now finds himself in a beautiful palace. He likes to explore it, but there comes the genie again, asking "How can I serve you, master?"
Every wish is immediately fulfilled, and when ignored, the genie takes away everything.
The poor man is annoyed and goes to the village sage, where he explains his problem.
After a silent conversation, the poor man steps to the genie and says: 'Genie, build me a large pole and stick it in the ground".
The genie immediately builds a pole and sticks it in the ground.
"Now genie, I want you to climb up and down the pole, over and over again".
The genie starts climbing right away.
And now the man has time to eat his meal, explore his palace and do other things.
When he and the sage go to see what the genie is doing, they see that he has fallen asleep next to the pole.
"And so it is with the thinking genie of every man", explains the sage.
"It is restless in its desire to satisfy every desire, and fragments our being.
The pole is a tool called a 'mantra'.
By repeating it over and over again, our restless mind is kept busy until it gets so bored that it falls asleep.
And this way our true self can enjoy the world."
morel:- you are more than your mind - don't worry and enjoy your self
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
what is the best way to live a success full life?
The chef cook and his daughter:
A daughter complained to her father about life and how things were so
hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted
to give up. She was tired of struggling. It seemed that as soon as one
problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with
water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In
one he placed carrots, in the second he placed eggs, and the last he
placed ground coffee beans. He let them sit and boil, without saying a
word.
The daughter sucked her teeth and impatiently waited, wondering what he
was doing. In about twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He fished
the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and
placed them a bowl. Then he ladled the coffee out and placed it in a
bowl. Turning to her he asked. "What do you see?"
"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.
He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and
noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break
it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. She smiled as she tasted its
rich aroma.
She said, "What's the point?"
He explained that each of the items had faced the same adversity -
boiling water - but each reacted differently.
The carrot went in strong and hard. But after being subjected to the
boiling water, it softened and became weak.
The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid
interior. But after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became
hardened.
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the
boiling water, they had changed the water.
A daughter complained to her father about life and how things were so
hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted
to give up. She was tired of struggling. It seemed that as soon as one
problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with
water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In
one he placed carrots, in the second he placed eggs, and the last he
placed ground coffee beans. He let them sit and boil, without saying a
word.
The daughter sucked her teeth and impatiently waited, wondering what he
was doing. In about twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He fished
the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and
placed them a bowl. Then he ladled the coffee out and placed it in a
bowl. Turning to her he asked. "What do you see?"
"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.
He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and
noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break
it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. She smiled as she tasted its
rich aroma.
She said, "What's the point?"
He explained that each of the items had faced the same adversity -
boiling water - but each reacted differently.
The carrot went in strong and hard. But after being subjected to the
boiling water, it softened and became weak.
The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid
interior. But after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became
hardened.
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the
boiling water, they had changed the water.
"Which are you?" he asked his daughter. "When adversity knocks on your
door, how do you respond? Do you become weak, like a carrot, hard on the
inside, like an egg, or do you change the circumstances, like the coffee beans?"
door, how do you respond? Do you become weak, like a carrot, hard on the
inside, like an egg, or do you change the circumstances, like the coffee beans?"
morel:- There are different ways to react to hardship. Don't be weak or suppress things - change circumstances from within.
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
publish at http://discuss-what-is.blogspot.com/
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